DNR

A friend's mother is nearing the end of her life.

I know the friend pretty well, but the mother a lot less so. Mom is 90, is in horrible health but she does not want to let go. My head spins.

On one side, there sure isn't any quality of life left, and she is wearing her family down, making inroads on their health. But she is entitled to live, or is she?

When friends Dad was asked about DNR (Do Not Resuscitate), he readily agreed and signed the form. Mom is not wanting to admit that it might be a good idea. He died last year.

None of this sits well on my head or my friends for that matter. Someone said once, that heroes know when to die. The possibility of a LOT of bad memories, really bad ones is real. My mom went from health to death in about 6 months. She had cancer, as did Miriam's mom.

Mom did pretty good until the last two or three weeks. All of her kids were here and we spent lots of time with her. I regret nothing and I have no bad memories, other than loosing my mother and friend.

I remember reading a western one time. Don't remember much of the story, but the hero went out into the wilderness and died. The author said it “was a good death.” I have never been sure of why the author wrote it that way, but that line has haunted me for decades.

Maybe when it comes our time, and we look death in the eye and don't flinch (much). We only go that way once and there is no dress rehearsal.

We all hope to die in our sleep at an old age, but we don't get our wishes, often.

And my head spins and my gut growls.