i did?

Miriam did not to terribly well in grade school or even high school.

Her dad, in a fit of christian humility, had told her that she was like him: “dumb in books.” Of course, she believed him. Truthfully, both were quite bright. It was not until she was being tested for Alzheimer’s that Miriam took any real tests. Turns out she is very bright.

But she got by, mostly C’s with a few Ds. I did not do a lot better. Our teachers did their best, but they did not try to really challenge us and to push us as I later learned to do with my students when I was a teacher.

But some how, with a bit of help from her mother Miriam finished high school.

So about a week ago Miriam and I were talking. It is not the same talking with her now as in earlier years. Her cognitive skills are not improving. We were visiting about this and that, like old married people do. A lot of our conversations are about our children and grandchildren, mixed with reminders of fidelity and devotion.

We know each other well enough to know what the other would think about almost any subject. It would seem that we might run out of things to talk about, but we have not. She was asking questions about things she should have remembered, but did not.

We talked about our Texas years. She asked why we had gone to Texas. “Did I graduate from college?” She asked. I cringed.

“Yes, you graduated from Texas Women’s University, with a BFA in painting.” She graduated with straight A’s in her major field, and had wonderful B’s in most of her academics, with a sprinkling of A’s.

She looked at me with that look that 7 year olds give when they make a major discovery. “I DID?”

“Yes, and you did all of the classwork for an M.A. But you got a job in Washington State and did not finish your thesis, so you didn’t quite finish that one.”

“I DID!?!” “My momma would be so proud of me.” Marie, Miriam’s mom graduated from high school at 12, went to business school for two years, before she married Miriam’s dad. She was 17. Sadly she died at 57, a long time ago.

Marie bore 4 children, Miriam is the oldest. Her father had 3 sons by his first marriage (his wife died when the boys were very young). And the 7 of them have done alright for themselves, but only Miriam actually graduated from college.

I was and am so proud of her. But this exchange tore at my heart.