compunctious guilt

How much should an old man try to get done? Or: At what point does abject laziness set in?

It is hot summer and not the most conducive to long hard hours outside, besides I am not really wanting to! I was in the garden this morning at 6:30 and worked until breakfast. I did.

Hey, we had a late breakfast too. I saw that look.

There are housekeeping tasks that have to be done, and I do not mean those. Miriam does most of those. But at my age, should I feel bad if I do not get too much more done?

My dad used to say grace over our meals and he would add an interesting line: “and Lord help us to improve our time.” I am not exactly sure what he meant, and he did not live as old as I am now, so maybe he would have said it differently, I will never know.

On a place like this there are a dozen fairly major projects that I should/could/might take on. My life will tick on if I do or don’t -- that won’t change, but my guilt might.

Am I saving my strength, or squandering it? Hmm. Would those projects keep me young, or is the risk of injury too high? A good accident at this point might be “the beginning of the end.” I am not sure. One must always calculate the downside.

I have friends who in retirement are fashioning a whole new life for themselves, involving a lot of big projects. One couple are working on a house and out building project that will take 10 to 12 years start to finish. They are about ¾ finished. That may be a tad excessive, though they seem to be enjoying themselves.

Maybe just knowing them is working on my guilt, or is it that they should be inspiring me, and I a feeling guilty because it is not working? Hmm again.

At some point I am going to wish I had done a bunch of these big messy projects because at whatever age I would be then, I am sure I could not do any of them then. And how is that for a guilt maker?

I can always use the excuse that we are short of money. Who would dare argue with me. My guess is that the real Bill Gates postpones some of his projects for that reason, or maybe not.

One of my daughters said I should pretty do what I wanted. So far this summer, I have done that one pretty well.

So, I will relax in the comfort of my recliner here in my part underground house where it is cool, and I will cogitate over this matter.

And, by the way, when you bring me that cold drink, could you put it on my right side with the straw pointing my direction. I hate to waste energy moving that silly straw around.

Thanks.