loss

I must be getting old.

Some one told me not to become cynical as I got older, but it seems inevitable.

Our country faces so many problems, but we are seem to have our fingers in our ears as we shout and scream at any who don’t see the world our way. Most of the time we don’t even know what our way is, but we scream any way. Meantime, little gets done.

My church is the one I attended the first week after I was born. I have generations of loyalty, but that loyalty is being put to the test. Lots of reasons, not many I want to write about right now, but they are churning in my gut.

There is a verse in scripture describing people of another time: “They did what was right in their own eyes.” That is both a positive statement and a horrible condemnation. And, I am caught in the confusion.

Even as my head has spent a lifetime swimming upstream, I had hoped that some how, by some magic my daughters and their families would have a better handle on it all. In a lot of wonderful ways they do, but those cussed elephants are going well too.

I have lost so many friends lately. Another is seriously ill of lung cancer. I do not seem to be making many new friends, and I hold the old ones close. I do not require a lot of friends, and I do not mind being alone.

That is a good thing, I guess.