money

I am extremely pleased with my family, and I will admit a bit of myopia along the way.

You know if you don’t love your kids, how do you expect some one else to do it either. But there are exceptions.

Wills are a necessary part of life, I am sure.

We have one, not that there is a lot to will, but there is a willingness at the least. Distant family just redid their will. ¼ here and ¼ there and ¼ to their one child, but none at all for his child of a former marriage.

This child defied her father most of a lifetime ago and married someone that was not “acceptable.” There are important scruples here, after all. Hooey with what it does to the family, we gotta hold up those scruples.

This child, a very capable woman, lives close to the parents in their retirement and looks after them often and well, but she “doesn’t need the money.” Huge message there.

The problem is that the message is not just a jab from father to an otherwise exemplary, helpful daughter, but between father and the whole family and from family member of family member, who must some how cope with the built in anger.

One of my daughters went through a nasty divorce. She asked nothing, all she got was her wedding ring which she sold. She just wanted out. The husband thought he had more money than he did, he was an MD after all, but I remember something daughters said to me:

“Dad money can be genuinely evil.”

Of course it is not the money itself, but how we use money to push others around. It is about power and very twisted power at that.

I know there is nothing glorious about poverty, and I know that abject poverty is horrible to the body and the soul. Most of the time I am content with my standing (the gov reminded me of my rating) but much more that my soul is rich for other more important reasons.

This may be the home of the free, but don’t tell your father in law when he revises his will because of your actions.

Maybe daughter was right.